Room to Grow

My grandson will be born today. They will induce early so he has room to grow.

As my little girl gives birth it is like she was just born yesterday instead of twenty plus years ago. My grandson is coming early because he is not growing enough. I pray for my daughter as she goes through this first pain. This will not be the last time she has to let go of something so he has room to grow.

I have another grandson in South Carolina. He is three and growing so fast and learning so much. I am in Germany, he and my son seem so far away.

When the baby is born I will be a couple of rooms from my daughter and she will still be far away.

I would love to hold both of my grandsons and keep them safe, to have them sitting beside me where I could tell them stories but they both will both need room to grow.

I look at both of my children and see so many mistakes I made as a father and a parent. Sometimes I held too tight, sometimes I did not hold tight enough. When you hold too tight they don’t grow but if you don’t hold tight enough they tend to have to learn lessons the hard way.

My children spent most of their lives in Germany. They saw so many things and I prayed they learned from the good and from the bad. They saw great art and bad art, they touched history, and they saw people who dedicated their lives to their country both military and civilians. They saw a home that was opened to those who needed a place for a night, a week, a month or a year. They learned to share their possesions both material and time.

They saw Church not from the pew but from the inside. That means they saw the good and the bad. They saw great celebrations and great pain both from the same place. There were times when the church was put first and they had to keep their opinions to themselves. Even the times when they were right, just to keep the peace.

On my desk is a picture of a nineteen year old girl from Pickens, South Carolina. That same girl sits on the couch with me every night and I see what amazing things can happen when a person has room to grow. She is strong and smart, she sees the little things, and has made me a better man. She also aged really well, too.

So on the occasion of my second grandson’s birth I have this for both of my children.

You will make mistakes along the way. Prayer does not always fix them. Love is one thing you cannot give enough of but be careful not to smother those you love because you love them. Stay close enough that they know you are there but... you will have to let go of the bike so they can learn. When they see you did let go they will probably crash. Pick them up, dust them off, and make them do it again. They may someday forgive you for letting go.

Love them for who they are not who you want them to be.

When you give them room to grow there will be pain and it will be mostly yours because it is hard.